Living Right Here and Now

Living Right Here and Now

 So much happened since the last time I blogged. I lost my Dad in January 2011 and it was a very traumatic experience but God saw me through it all and  I find courage and closure in his word daily.

I moved to Lagos in 2010 to attend the Nigerian Law school which I have successfully completed.

Right now, I am a 26 year old single lady working as a lawyer in a law firm and   living alone in Lagos.

Lately, I have been doing a lot of thinking about life, marriage, and love.... In Nigeria once a young girl finishes university, the pressure to get married is unbelievable. The pressure is from everyone and it hits even worse when  it comes  from family. No matter a lady's achievements, the average Nigerian's mentality is that she can never be complete without a man to call her husband.

Recently, I attended my bestfriend's wedding and was  again reminded by my  friends and family of my single status. Infact my Mother even adviced that I should join a department in church and practise fasting once every week for the gift of a husband. While, I do not think that joining a department in church or fasting are bad ideas, I am alarmed by the discrimination against singles in our society.

Singles especially older singles are looked upon as social outcasts or  misfits of the society. With the increasing pate of divorce and unhappy marriages, my mind always ponders the reason for the stigma associated with singlehood.

Since when did marriage become the sole aim of a woman's existence and the definition of her happiness. Every where you turn there are " tips on how to catch a husband". The predicament is so disturbing as society does not believe that a woman can be single and happy. The single woman is treated as a leper on the social ladder. Not to mention the unsolicited matchmaking attempts by friends and families who believe their sole purpose on earth is to find you a mate. ( Personally, I have decided not to go for another blind date again.... Urgghhh!)

Once a lady of marriageable age is not married, the next thing people will start saying is " she is so fine, how come she is not yet married.. she must have a bad character", or " maybe she has a spirit husband who is disturbing her"! Others would start advising you on how to marry any cheating slimy bastard beacuse all men cheat, or they would advice you to lose weight and use bleaching cream to lighten your skin so as to attract a husband.... I could go on and on.

Personally,  I have resolved to live right here and now.My life is so beautiful and I am determined to live in that beauty every second being grateful for all I have and am..... and hopefully someday, everyone will learn that our lives do not begin or end the day we get married.

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